Showing posts with label satire. Show all posts
Showing posts with label satire. Show all posts

Friday, January 24, 2014

5 (WOMENS!) fashion trends guys hate

If you’ve been reading anything on the internet or on fashion magazines recently, you’ve probably seen countless articles about women’s fashion trends that GUYS hate. I’ve decided to invite a few ~real life guys~ to give their opinions on their least favorite fashion trends; because everyone knows that the most important judge of what a woman is wearing, is a man.


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1) confidence
That's right ladiezz, if you're a female, and you love your body, dudes HATE that. I mean seriously, what do you girls think you're doing, you can't just do something that doesn't seek the constant approval of a man, it's just gross. "Insecurity is hot. " - real life guy


2) comfort
All girls dress for guys, and guys love girls that put a lot of effort into their clothes (but also, don’t put too much effort, it makes you seem like you’re trying too hard) If you want to make your man happy, *sic* dress like you’re always ready for a party, (but look laid back and relaxed). We know you womenfolk think men love the natural look, but when we wake up and see you without makeup, it feels like you're launching a personal attack on our livelihood (this may be hard for you to understand). Makeup makes you look nice, (but as always, not too much)


3) dressing for yourself


“There is nothing uglier than a girl who only dresses to make herself feel good and doesn’t care what anyone else thinks.”


4) individuality of any sort


Oh my gosh it’s so irritating and gross when girls think they can just dress however they like. But when girls all dress the same it’s really boring, and makes them look stupid.


3) peplums (looks like maternity wear), beanies (dumb), wedge sneakers, floppy hats (makes you look old), open-side shirts (too revealing), bright lipstick (gooey), heavy makeup, bandeaus, pointy heels, high waisted jeans/shorts/skirts (makes you look frumpy), fake nails, fold over boots, high heels (shows how clumsy women are), pantsuits (you're a woman, not a man), drop crotch pants, hair bows (makes you look too young), bangles (too clangy), oversized sweaters (cover up too much), mullet dresses (Where's the party? You're covering the back *sic*), leggings, jeggings (ditch the jeggings, your man will be much happier *sic*), shoulder pads, leg warmers (not the 80s), Uggs, neon (not in good taste), oversized glasses .
I know what you girls are thinking, "What? We might as well walk around naked!" All right, but honestly, it's a little too revealing for us guys.

*the parts that say “*sic*” are literally words that came from an actual website that people read for actual fashion advice. Credit to All Women Stalk and Huff Post (but I don’t know why you would want to take credit for this.)